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Thu 27 Apr 2017
My Darling Grace
Written by Gor   
Tuesday, 09 March 2004 00:00

It has been nearly eight months now since my daughter, Grace, came out to see the world. There have been so many things, both good and bad, going on before and after she was born. This was mostly because I was stuck somewhere between being a teenager and an adult. Back then, I thought that I was already an adult but I was completely wrong. Having a baby made me realize that there are still so many things I didn’t know about the adult’s world.

When Tai and I moved away from my parents’ house for the first time, I started to think that I was an adult already. After all, I was responsible for nearly everything alone. I had to be the head of my own family. I worked very hard nearly every day just to earn some money to support my girlfriend and myself. And also, as Tai was pregnant back then, I had to do the chores around the house after I came back from work.

We had been staying there for only about three or four months before we decided to move back to stay with my parents. I was finding it very hard as the house was pretty far from work and I also didn’t like the idea of leaving Tai home alone. Even though we gave up from living on our own, I still thought about myself as an adult. Without knowing it back then, this was the start of something, which was going to get me into big trouble in the near future.

A short while after we had moved back to stay with my parents’, I went back to hang out with my friends again. All the responsibilities I had were disappearing with the wind. It was partly because Tai wasn’t home alone any more; she was now with my parents. So I did not have to be worried about her any more.

As I had been working and looking after Tai for months, I had pretty much forgotten about my friends. I now missed them. I started to spend too much time hanging out with them and forgot all about my own family situation; what I had to do and how important my work was. I started to be absent from work and often went back home late without feeling guilty. I didn’t know why. It’s like I was going back to being a teenager again without knowing it myself.

My mother scolded me a couple of times about me not going to work but I didn’t listen. Once, she was scolding and complaining about me being irresponsible, which really bored me and made me moody. I remember I yelled back at her; "I am an adult now, leave me alone. I know what I am doing." But I didn’t really.I kept acting like that for most of the time. I didn’t begin to be an adult again until Tai went into the hospital.

At 12.44 pm on Friday 11th July 2003, I heard the cry of my lovely baby daughter for the first time. I had been standing in front of the operating room for about one hour. A few minutes later, I saw a nurse come out with Grace. It was the first time I saw her and in that second, I realized that I had become a father. A short time later, while I was holding Grace in my arms, I knew that I should now become an adult full-time.

Becoming a father is a wonderful thing. Grace is everything to me; she is the most important and amazing thing that has ever happened to me in my life. Without her, I wouldn’t have become the person I am now. She has some kind of power that helps me change my life. Whenever I am feeling down or moody, all I have to do is look at her smiling face. My life began to get better from the first moment I saw her.

"Grace, you are an angel for me. Remember, Daddy will always love you."